Sunday, May 23, 2010

News Flash - A Barbary Tail gets a mention on local radio..

I nearly choked on my banana to hear this blog being plugged on Michelle Rugeroni's brilliant morning show on Sunday mornings.  Its usually very quiet up here Sunday mornings so we all tune in and bop about to the tunes.  The tourists haven't got a clue.  Tune in every Sunday morning at 11.00 for 'the Ruge's' show.  
She's talking about me, she has to be brilliant!


See the posts below to see why she's talking about me and feel free to leave a comment or two...

Saturday, May 22, 2010

A modern-day David & Goliath: Discuss

Last week, during a religious education class (we all learn, naturally, together in the same room/cage) we came across the story of David & Goliath. The class went ape with victorious enthusiasm as the teacher taught us of David's victory over Goliath and how he returned home with Goliath's head in his hands.  Break time was upon us and we all strutted out to our respective walls for the day, ready to take on all comers, empowered by that fantastic story.
Not ten minutes later, bored and looking for some food to steal or a handy taxi driver to feed me, a tourist pointed out a couple of boats in the bay...  It would seem that the Spanish Guardia Civil had, once more, ventured over into Gibraltar waters to say 'good morning' to their Royal Gibraltar Police counterparts and went on their merry way. Only it doesn't actually seem that it was that simple, not from how my two friends the taxi drivers were ranting.  One more had joined the group and we had a three-way argument about what was going on, down on the water. 
The story goes that the Civil Guard keeps getting lost, which is weird considering the technology I'm told is available these days (I have to take your word, I'm just an ape), and the RGP pops out to remind them that they're in British waters and would they be so kind as to get out.
It seems to me that that's probably all the RGP can do in the circumstances.  I look north and there it is, Spain, as far as the eye can see.  Its a pretty big place isn't it?  I know we're not THAT big. Besides, as one of the taxi drivers said (let's call him Mr Sensible), its apparently Britain's responsibility to defend our sovereignty, not our own.  When, Mr Sensible explains, the other taxi driver (let's call this one Mr I Complain for the sake of Complaining, or 'Joe' for short)'s favoured political party was in Government, it never did anything about what they call incursions.  If the government takes Britain to court and takes the hard line, Joe complains that the government's being too harsh.  If the government lightens up, Joe complains he's not doing enough!  What's more, Joe keeps insisting that the RGP should be given the resources to deal with the threat of further incursions: what, like a couple of nuclear submarines?  I hear Tireless is being decommissioned soon... (brace yourself for the backlash from Howitt & the Hickory Huggers!)
Talk about going ape, and we know it when we see it, it seems that Joe's lost the plot (not recently either - think the Constitution).  It seems that Joe advocates that we go head to head with Spain, that we put our police officers in situations where today, tomorrow and forever there will be a simply overwhelming inequality of arms!  All this would be fine if Joe & Sons had actually advocated or done this themselves when they were able to, but of course, they didn't...  


It seems this is one taxi driver who is taking the David and Goliath story a little too far, somewhat dangerously so, actually. A sling and some rocks, a sword maybe, and a little cunning might have seen David take the win but these days, Goliath has one of these...







Friday, May 21, 2010

Punch & Judy politics?

Just taking a break from parading my leathery bottom to a few tourists to catch up on the news today and, my oh my, the PDP's Keith Azopardi may be having a Clegg moment. He says, "We want to know what people think and show everyone that we are a strong real alternative to the old acrimonious, destructive, Punch and Judy politics of the GSD and GSLP."  
The coverage of the UK election was pretty special and it got quite boring quite quickly to hear Nick Clegg, who had nothing to lose and everything to gain after his performances on the leaders' debates, how he was the alternative to the old and tired politics, over and over and over again.  It was the catchphrase for his election.  Result?  Hung parliament.
Now, 'hanging around' is something us apes are quite partial to but its not quite so much good fun when what's hanging around is a country's governing institutions. No direction, no leadership.  But we all know what happened next...
I wonder what other unexpected and impossible allegiances a similar approach locally may bring about?  Who knows....
But what do I know, I'm just an ape with a stub for a tail...





Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Can I go for a swim with a Dolphin?

Minding my own business this afternoon (a right scorcher it was and all), downing a couple of bags of wine gums I snatched off another unsuspecting tourist, I overheard a bit of a ruckus going on between two of our feeders, I mean taxi drivers, and so I shuffled over to listen in.  

They were arguing about whether or not we should have a dolphinarium here in Gibraltar and, whilst I may not look like the sharpest knife in the box, I'm a pretty talented ape. The guy who sounded like he was against the whole thing was talking about how the dolphins are treated badly and how we don't need it and that, somehow, there could be a better use of the land.  Funnily enough, there was no suggestion from him as to what exactly would be more 'imaginative.'  I found it particularly funny how the guy saying it was a bad idea had had such a good time on holiday with the kids last year, swimming with Dolphins... but not in Gibraltar, no, we're better than all that!

The guy who was in favour of it seemed to have really done his homework.   I surreptitiously took a detailed note of what he said.  A summary of the main attractions was an interactive swim with dolphins experience as well as sea lion and parrot shows; a walk-through aquarium centre which would include many indigenous species; a Battle of Trafalgar and Nelson display housed within a specially constructed museum (which sounds fantastic); leisure facilities including a restaurant, bar, children’s play area and shop as well as a classroom and day centre facility for special needs children. Heck, we could with some of that action up here!

The taxi driver couldn't be sure but said that surely a project like this would see significant investment (maybe somewhere over £20m, I wonder how many packets of monkey nuts that gets me), a rebuild and regeneration of the area of Rosia Bay to which anglers would still have access, giving us a much improved tourist product which would generate a significant amount of business. Quite apart from that, and as irrelevant as it may be for me up here, it looks as if the project would generate significant employment and therefore additional revenue, whatever that is...

Frankly, it sounds like a great deal of fun. I'd love to go for a swim myself with the dolphins and I'm sure that so would many of our special needs children, which studies show respond positively to interaction with animals generally and dolphins specifically.  I really don't understand what all the fuss is about and why so many are against it.  They've probably got caught up in the frenzy fed by one or two who may have more than just 'animal rights' in mind, but hey, I'm in captivity and let's be honest, I hardly have a hard life...

But what do I know, I'm just an ape with a stub for a tail...

Thursday, May 13, 2010

The Airport Vultures

Only my second post and its already a subject of some controversy.  This is a comment I posted in response to a comment made on the Llanito World blog, a blog which seems to have picked up quite a following, which I read earlier today whilst on a break from eating a couple of bananas.

The latest topic was that of the airport and, frankly, its a bit of a disappointment to see how many people locally are chomping at the bit to throw the complete failure of the airport project in the government's face... Here's what I wrote:

"It's quite sad to note that there are so many of us here who either:

a.) have already decided that the airport will be a catastrophic failure and monumental waste of money on the basis of the commercial failure of one or two routes; or

b.) worse still, harbour hopes that the airport will be a catastrophic failure in order that they're able to massage their own egos in saying, as vociferously as possible, 'I told you so!' as they celebrate a failure of Peter Caruana and the GSD.  How pathetic.

Surely it is in the community's interests that we ourselves are the loudest proponents of the merits of having an airport.  Is it not better to shout from the rooftops how fantastic we think the project is in the hope of infusing its prospective users with our enthusiasm, rather than allow ourselves to be swallowed whole by the negativity of a few, doing all they can to see it fail so they can attack the government anew.

We've seen it before though haven't we.  The GSLP not having the political spine to have an official position on the New Constitution (the drafting and steering of which they had participated in) only to secretly encourage a 'no' vote to (coining a phrase here) 'hacerle la put*da a Caruana!'

How ridiculous then (if not wholly unexpected) to read the unfathomable (and I hate to be so frank) stupidity of Mr Garcia, stating that Joe Holliday's visit to the Routes Forum is 'a reflection of their desperation to bring in different players in order to justify the enormous cost of the new air terminal building.' How on earth are we supposed to market the existence of the new terminal and facilities.  Has he not even the remotest bit of common sense to understand what surely most of us do: that these airlines aren't going to come to you, you have to go to them!  We're selling a product here people, that's what we're doing!  I don't know how Mr Garcia carries on his business but, if his idea of marketing is to sit around waiting for work to fall into his lap, he won't make a very good Minister for Tourism, if a Minister for anything at all.

It beggars belief that we should be in this situation.  We are our own worst enemy and, for the sake of silly party politics, we'll shoot ourselves in the foot to make a point.

Wow"

But what do I know? I'm just an ape with a stub for a tail...

Gibraltar IS a special place

Welcome to A Barbary Tail.

I have a list of things I want to achieve with this blog. Firstly, I'd like to point out the many reasons why Gibraltar is such a brilliant place to live. Secondly, I'd like to spend a little time trying to dispel the myths that some in our community are happy to create and hopefully persuade people to see the brighter side of life. So often we hear that 'this could have been done like that' and, maybe, 'I would have done that differently,' with a liberal use of the phrase 'we could do it better.'

There are many things in Gib that could be better, no doubt, but my belief is that certain goals can only be achieved if the community understands that it too owes a duty to itself and shares in the responsibility of making sure that Gib succeeds with the government of the day.

I'll be pointing out, over time, the very many ways in which, over the last fifteen years (since the removal of the previous GSLP government) we've developed as a community and as an international centre for business as well as created an economy which is standing the tests of both time and unprecedented global economic difficulty.

But what do I know? I'm just an ape with a stub for a tail...